This is Prostitute, an entry originally posted on May 3, 2003 in the blog nebulose.net. In chronological order, before this was Dear Dick. After this comes Alternate Stories I Could Tell When People Ask About My Recently-Broken Wrist. If you're lost, I recommend the about page.

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Prostitute

It’s Tuesday night. I’m sitting here, debating whether or not I should watch that public spectacle known as American Idol. Music is playing.

Thought 1: Well, some of the contestants are pretty good, but none of them hold a candle to Maynard.

(Pause, inward chuckle.)

Thought 2: What if Maynard had been on American Idol?

Relevant excerpts from one of my favorite songs:

I met a boy wearing Vans, 501s, and a
Dope Beastie t, nipple rings, and
New tattoos that claimed that he
Was OGT,
From ‘92,
The first EP.

And in between
Sips of Coke
He told me that
He thought
We were sellin’ out,
Layin’ down,
Suckin’ up
To the man.

All you know about me is what I’ve sold you.
I sold out long before you ever heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
And you bought one.

All you read and
Wear or see and
Hear on TV
Is a product
Begging for your
Fatass dirty
Dollar

So…Shut up and
Buy my new record
Send more money…

American Idol is brought to you by Old Navy, AT&T Wireless, and Coca-Cola: Real. Thanks, commercialism.

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Comments

duuude you posted that may 3 but thats today and thats saturday. what now? i win.
OWNED

Posted by sylvia at May 3, 2003 5:37 PM :: Link

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